After a Loss: What to Do When Someone Dies — A Complete Family Guide

Grief and logistics should not have to compete for the same hour.

This guide puts everything in the order it actually needs to happen — so you can focus on what matters most right now.

When someone dies, the people closest to them face an overwhelming collision of grief and logistics. Most families have never done any of this before. This guide organizes everything into a clear timeline.

Not under hospice care (unexpected): Call 911 immediately. Do not move the body until authorities give clearance. The medical examiner or coroner will determine whether an autopsy is needed.

Terminal illness without hospice: Call the deceased's primary care physician. They can sign the death certificate if they were the treating doctor.

Medical staff handle the pronouncement and start paperwork. They will ask you to select a funeral home. The facility has a holding area — there is no rush to decide in the first hour. Take a breath.

Local authorities and medical examiner will take jurisdiction. Contact a funeral home in your home area — they coordinate long-distance transportation ($1,000–$5,000 for domestic transfers).

Use the RememberMe.fm funeral services directory to find providers near you.

Designate a point person to coordinate notifications. Use a phone tree approach — the point person calls 3–4 key family members, each of whom calls their branch.

If the deceased lived alone:

• Lock the residence and secure valuables. Obituaries broadcast when homes will be empty.
• Arrange for mail hold or forwarding
• Adjust HVAC to prevent damage
• Arrange immediate care for pets
• Do not start cleaning out the home until after probate guidance

Work with the funeral director on burial vs. cremation, service type, date/time/location, and the obituary. For a complete walkthrough, see our How to Plan a Funeral guide.

• Request final paycheck and accrued vacation/sick pay
• Inquire about employer-sponsored life insurance
• File for pension or retirement benefits for survivors
• Request COBRA continuation of health insurance (60-day election window)
• Ask about Employee Assistance Programs for grief counseling

Bring a certified death certificate to each institution:

• Banks: Freeze individual accounts. Joint accounts with right of survivorship pass to the survivor.
• Investments/brokerage: Request beneficiary claim forms. TOD accounts bypass probate.
• Mortgage: Notify; a surviving spouse can usually continue payments without refinancing (Garn-St. Germain Act).
• Credit cards: Notify and close. The estate — not you — is responsible for balances.

• Life insurance: File with each insurer using a death certificate copy. Benefits are generally tax-free and arrive within 30–60 days.
• Health insurance: Cancel or convert dependent coverage. Submit outstanding claims.
• Auto/home insurance: Notify carriers. Policies may need retitling.

• Final Form 1040: Income through date of death. Due April 15 of the following year. Mark "DECEASED" at top.
• Estate Form 1041: Required if estate earns over $600 after the date of death.
• Estate Form 706: Only for estates exceeding $13.61 million (2024 federal exemption). Some states have lower thresholds.

Real property, vehicles, investment accounts, and digital assets all need to be transferred or closed. Check each platform's deceased-user policy for digital accounts (Apple, Google, Facebook all have them).

Losing someone is never easy, but knowing what steps to take — and in what order — reduces the overwhelming stress. Use the RememberMe.fm funeral services directory to find compassionate professionals in your area.

What should I do first when someone dies?

If the person was under hospice care, call the hospice nurse first — not 911. If the death was unexpected, call 911 immediately. Then contact a funeral home. They will transport the body, handle the death certificate, and guide you through the next steps.

Am I responsible for a deceased family member's debts?

In most cases, the deceased's debts belong to the estate, not to surviving family members. There are limited exceptions for community property states and joint accounts. Do not pay any debts before consulting an attorney or financial advisor.

How many death certificates should I order?

Order at least 10 to 15 certified copies. You will need them for life insurance claims, bank accounts, property transfers, Social Security, credit cards, vehicle registrations, and more. Ordering them through the funeral home at the time of death is easier and less expensive than requesting them later.

When is probate required after someone dies?

It depends on the estate size and how assets are titled. Many states have simplified probate for estates under $50,000 to $150,000. Assets in joint tenancy, beneficiary-designated accounts, and living trusts generally pass outside probate. Attorney fees typically run 1 to 5 percent of the estate value.

What tax returns need to be filed after someone dies?

A final Form 1040 must be filed for income through the date of death, due April 15 of the following year. If the estate earns over $600 after the date of death, Form 1041 is required. Estate Form 706 is only needed for estates exceeding the federal exemption threshold ($13.61 million in 2024).

As you plan a service and begin carrying their memory forward, a custom memorial song can preserve their story in a form you can return to long after the first difficult months.

Honoring a loved one? Create a personalized memorial song at RememberMe.fm